NoSalesTax

Two Elon alumni (2002) have pooled their talents to bring excitement and joy to your day. One is a classy woman who combines her Italian and feminine powers to influence men of all shapes and sizes. The other is a tall blond man who relies on wit and boyish good looks to impress women, especially when they're drunk. Join them in their epic pursuit of the phenomenon known as adulthood. NoSalesTax side effects may include addiction and abrupt laughter as colleagues look on in confused jealousy.

Friday, April 28, 2006

It's marketing, people

And it's everywhere. Today I got my birth control refilled. (That's right...I do it......AND I shack up!) and inside my lil' pack of pleasure I found an offer to join the "Lo-Down" club (the name of the pill has "Lo" in it). Clever right? If you join the Lo-Down club, it reads, you can recieve a free pill dispenser. There is quite a variety or pill dispensers- one has jewels encrusted in it, another has red high heels and lipstick on it, a third has a variety of words such as "Passionate, Free, Confident, Independent, Ambitious," etc.
SO let's break this down...what kinda lady carries each of these?
The jewels? You like youre birth control extravagant, fabulous. You want those pills to make your vagina sparkle.
The red high heels? Do I need to even go there? Red heels= lady of the night.
And the one with the words? I have no comment for that one. No comment.
Well, the marketing maniac in me had to sign on and see what the deal was with the Lo-Down club and these free pill packs, so I did. I signed up for the club, and I was THIS CLOSE to getting my free pill pack (I was going for the one with the jewels, to be frank) and then BAM! I hit submit, and the next page could not be found...there was an error.
So basically, I was lured into the Lo-Down club, promised a be-dazzled pill pack, forced to sell my soul to the marketing Gods who now have my name, address and email, and I have nothing to show for it.
Oh well, at least I'm not pregnant.

1 Comments:

At 10:19 AM, Blogger J-Mazz said...

The pill dispenser w/ words must be geared toward women w/ low self-esteem. It's good to know you strive to make "your vagina sparkle."

 

Post a Comment

<< Home