Two Elon alumni (2002) have pooled their talents to bring excitement and joy to your day. One is a classy woman who combines her Italian and feminine powers to influence men of all shapes and sizes. The other is a tall blond man who relies on wit and boyish good looks to impress women, especially when they're drunk. Join them in their epic pursuit of the phenomenon known as adulthood. NoSalesTax side effects may include addiction and abrupt laughter as colleagues look on in confused jealousy.

Thursday, January 13, 2005

Ode to the Mazz

When my radio/blog co-host told me he was leaving, I was excited for him. Living here in the district hasn’t been the best experience for him (although he has had many a memory made at the Y and on his block with the vagrant posse who yells at him). I think a new start in a new place might be the way to get a new mindset. Maybe that’s what DC was supposed to be, but maybe he is really ready now.
I don’t get to see my bro as much as I’d like, we are both busy and I am happily rammed up my boyfriend’s butt much of the time….plus if we spent more time together, J-Mazz might not have all the rewarding locker room experiences he has written about. Far be it from me to hinder locker room experiences.
But isn’t that what friends do? See each other scarcely and talk about how great it would be to see each other more?
Oh, that’s just me? Crap. I’ve been a bad friend. Let me see if I can make it up to you, J-Mazz, with this little poem….

We met with a shot in the chest
We bonded over grunts and nods
Who knew I’d learn you were the best
At making laughter flow like….a god?

The position master, residence life
The Big Kahuna, the boat
Spiky blonde hair, guide me through strife
Your Patriots and Red Sox gloat

Posing for the sports tip of the week
Eating pizza at 3 am
Steeling a wheel chair off the street
The Pendulum- never the same again

99 cent margarita night
free chips till the Real World comes on
Ending bad dreams- you showed me the light
Peeing on my neighbors lawn

Good luck- new city, show him the way
Get him a woman and a new dream
Make a new start, but remember old days
Don’t forget the Phoenix scream

(And then Padgett puts his head in his hands and tries to figure out how he can get us switched into Byung’s class)


At 10:29 AM, Blogger J-Mazz said...

Thanks for the kind words. And thanks for always laughing when I tripped and fell on a regular basis when we were in college.

Never forget making fun of Jimmy Eat World (Bring it back, whoooahhhhhhhhhh) before the general public had ever heard of 'em. Never forget my first jellyfish sting. You never forget your first. And always, always remember playing footsy w/ me in Padgett's class ("I have a girlfriend.").

May your neighbor's bush R.I.P. Death by golden shower: What a way to go.


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