NoSalesTax

Two Elon alumni (2002) have pooled their talents to bring excitement and joy to your day. One is a classy woman who combines her Italian and feminine powers to influence men of all shapes and sizes. The other is a tall blond man who relies on wit and boyish good looks to impress women, especially when they're drunk. Join them in their epic pursuit of the phenomenon known as adulthood. NoSalesTax side effects may include addiction and abrupt laughter as colleagues look on in confused jealousy.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Time for Reflection

I always seem to get more philosophical during the holidays. Perhaps it's the contagious merriment or just the overwhelming realization that another year of life is gone. Either way, it's time for me to pose one of my questions. Give it some thought and please post your answer as a "comment." I'd love to hear your answer.

Everyone's seen a movie, read a book or heard a song about someone who cannot get over a past love. The character may be happily married, unhappily married, or still sad and single. What I'm wondering is, do you think most people marry the person they love the most? Or do you think a great deal of people you pass on the street wish they'd held on to a previous lover? This question has started to bother me as I begin attending friends' weddings. If marriage is the farthest thing from your mind (as it is for me), tell me what you think about dating and relationships. Is the next one always the best, or do people carry w/ them memories of a perfect relationship that ended prematurely?

What else is New Years for???

Sometimes I make New Years resolutions like, “Lose 25 pounds” or, “Fight for world peace”. Over the past year, I have felt the urge to pee…..just kidding…..i have felt the urge to create more physical tangible things….I got a sewing machine for my birthday. It sits on my kitchen table and every time I look at it, I want to make something. I’ve tried so many different kinds of “art” (in quotes because everyone’s definition of art is different….and some are scaaaaary) but I have some sort of weird fascination with fabric, beads and sequins. When you shop, do you want to touch all the fabrics? I do. I think this year I’ve learned a lot about what I enjoy doing, what I want to try and what will fulfill me on a intellectual and creative level…thus…..the resolutions!!!!! (drum roll)

1. Concentrate on sewing items from patterns more precisely
2. Buy a sketch book, start drawing and writing down my ideas for design. Take pictures of design that inspires me. Incorporate these things into an organized book
3. Read a book about textiles.
4. Design, make a pattern for, and sew together an original handbag
5. Incorporate sequins and beads into design
6. Create enough original products to have a table at Eastern Market one Saturday next fall.
7. Find a church
8. Try surfing
9. Visit my sister at college
10. Go to the gym at least 3 times a week (earth shattering, I know)

Two Steps Into Winter...

And it’s another 60-degree December day in DC (accidental alliteration). I’m lookin forward to flying up to winter tonite, where tomorrow I will greet N.H. w/ a much-needed haircut and overdue Christmas shopping. I’m most excited for New Year’s, though, because this is one of the few years I actually have plans. I guess I’m officially grown-up. My friend Sol lives in Portland, Maine, w/ his HS sweetheart Alicia. I’m riding up there Dec. 31 w/ my friend Steve and his g/f, Meredith. On the way, we’re picking our friend Jon up at the airport, who will be traveling w/ his new g/f Katie. Wow, this is starting to sound like a word problem in math class. Speaking of math, if you’re any good at ‘rithmetic, you’ve realized I’ve introduced six characters for New Year’s, three couples. Where does that leave me? Well, it could shape up to be the greatest New Year’s weekend of my life considering I’ll have three wingmen. Or it may turn out to be just like 2004. Either way, I’m sure it’ll be memorable as the seventh wheel. Here’s a quick rundown of our plans:

December 31
7:30am: Depart Keene, N.H., for Manchester Airport.

8:00am: Wish I were dead instead of riding on a two-lane highway with very little sleep.

8:30am: Fall asleep in the backseat.

8:35am: Wake up angry that I couldn’t fall asleep until five minutes before reaching the airport.

8:36am: Welcome Jon and his g/f, marking the second time in as many weeks I meet a friend’s g/f.

8:37am: “No bitch!”

10:00am: Pull up to Sol’s house and scout places for a nap.

1:00pm: Watch football.

4:00pm: Take a nap.

5:00pm: Get dressed (jacket and tie).

5:45pm: Finally give up trying to tie my tie and have someone else do it for me. Look for me in next year’s Special Olympics.

6:00pm: Fancy dinner with champagne.

6:30pm: Switch to beer.

3:00am: Watch the Red Sox 2004 DVD and the latest Patriots Super Bowl DVD.

Due to time (and attention-span) constraints, I’ll go ahead and end the hourly reports and just say how excited I am to go out Sat. nite., as well. Why? Well, after a dressed-up nite, we will be headin to the bars sporting Sox hats, World Series T-shirts and champagne goggles. Now if that’s not ringing in the New Year, I don’t know what is.

Great with child

So last night I was thinking about what I was doing a year ago...and it hit me that a year ago today, I was standing at an alter, as a bridesmaid in my first friend-wedding. I have been to several of my friends weddings since I graduated college, but this was the first that I actively participated in.

This deserves a whole entry in itself.

At any rate, a year ago, I was getting my hair done with the rest of the bridesmaids, and the bride’s 4 year old nephew, needed a babysitter. I sent him down to my hotel room, where my brother and boyfriend (my two handsome dates) were playing Rocky on Playstation 2 until the ceremony. When he arrived at the room, my brother sat him down on the edge of the bed. My boyfriend fell asleep, due to a cold and possible overdose on Nyquil.

My brother, first, offered the kid a beer. He declined. He did, however, want to play Rocky. When he noticed my boyfriend asleep in the bed, he asked why he was sleeping.

My brother’s response? “He is pregnant.”

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Suicide by Train

So some guy jumped in front of the Metro yesterday at Metro Center, one of the busiest stations in DC. It made me wonder what I would do if I'd witnessed the event. Granted, there's not much I could do to save the person's life. Walking off the platform as the train arrives is pretty tough for an onlooker to stop. I wonder if I'd watch in horror, or turn away in hopes of avoiding the image that would surely last long after the holiday season. I often think about these things. So, what d'ya think you would do?

Hail to the chief

Here are a few quotes from our fearful leader, taken from an article in this morning's Washington Post. Someone should get him a brain for christmas. Or a muzzle.
(great article, by the way. read the whole thing)

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/articles/A14748-2004Dec20.html?referrer=email

Qualifications for a director of national intelligence? "I'm going to find somebody who knows something about intelligence," Bush disclosed.

Timeline for Iraq? "We'd like to achieve our objective as quickly as possible."

Vladimir Putin's turn toward autocracy? "If we disagree with decisions, we can do so in a friendly and positive way."

When another questioner asked Bush to make his case for personal Social Security accounts, a wary Bush sought to suppress the negotiator within. "Yeah, I will try to explain how without negotiating with myself," he began

Monday, December 20, 2004

Is it time to eat?

It’s certainly the holiday season. If you didn’t notice the lights, the trees, the considerable dent in your checking account or the Christmas music (YES!!!) on the radio, then maybe you have noticed the ridiculous amount of junk food in your office kitchen.
My office kitchen is no exception. This morning, I arrived at 8 am to find a huge cheesecake on the table. By 8:45, at least 3 people had pieces. It is now 11:22 and it is practically gone. Who eats cheesecake at 8 in the morning?? To answer your question, no, it was not a breakfast cheesecake, if there even is such a thing.
Last week the kitchen was covered in fine chocolates, salted roasted pecans, chewy brownies and big chocolate chip cookies. There was also a variety of German gingerbread cookies and an assortment of hard candy.
Vendors, my friends, are the culprits. Everyone wants to say, thanks for your business! Or, give us your business next year! Or even, our prices are rising, but look! We sent cookies! Every vendor we use and don’t use has sent a variety of food……and I feel like they sent it to make me fat.
Most of these vendors don’t know me but I can’t help feeling like they hate me and want me to swell.
Maybe when we send these vendors thank you cards, we can say, “Thank you for the thoughtful gift, but the new girl is getting very fat. Maybe next year you can send delicious Slim Fast shakes and a jump rope.”